🍒


Have you ever felt like a pigeon caught in a hail storm?

Y’all remember how excited I was about how I hadn’t killed it in months? Well… Let’s hope I never have children.

jerkidiot:

have you ever stopped liking somebody that you liked a lot and suddenly notice that they are a shitty person and realize how blinded you were by how much you liked them

okaymad:

*tries to watch 45 minutes episode in 20 minutes*

(Source: okaymad)

17yr:

“hey im emotionally unstable and not good at texting do u wanna date me”


(Source: kelly-kapoor)

at the resturant with bae
  • waitress: *fills his glass with ice water*
  • me: *watches thot ass waitress pour a lil too much water for my liking*
  • me: you want my man or something?
  • her: wh-wat?
  • me: i'm just trying to figure out why u pour his glass first? im closer? why his water got so much ice?
  • me: I mean the glass already sweating bitch why u think he so dehydrated? im the only bitch who put ice in his glass.
  • me: everybody else got 3 ice square cubes and he got 5 circle ones bitch u think u slick huh? a circle for every minute u gon suck his dick huh? spelling out morris code for u can raw me in ice cubes huh?
  • him: aye calm down
  • me: nah cause she wanna give u 5 ice circles for what? its 72 degrees and mild 1 ice wud have been just fine. bitch gimme a male waiter--matta fact bitch when u get off cause its one too many ice circles and u think fat meat aint greasy

peachfruits:

summersinthesky:

WHY IS THIS BUNNY WEARING A BACKPACK? WHERE IS HE GOING TO GO? WHAT DOES HE HAVE IN THIS BACKPACK?

it’s his 1st day of school wish him luck

americanapparel:

Vinyl Mini Skirt is now available in black at retail stores!


Solve the riddle.

(Source: serfborts)

visiblecc1:

fuglypudding:

if watermelon exists why doesn’t earthmelon, firemelon and airmelon??

The elemelons

tylenold:

it’s not you’re* or your*. it’s all Mine. everything is Mine